MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
