I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
