It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
You made out with two different species that night
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize
