don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Randomize
