is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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