All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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