If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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