South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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