this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
