Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
