He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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