I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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