Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Randomize
