Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
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