The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
