Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
