Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
