living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
I am naked and annoyed.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize