I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
love makes seman taste better
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
