Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
