I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
