Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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