hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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