At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
We just shotgunned beers for America
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
