so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Randomize
