you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
