do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
