I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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