Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
