Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
