my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
ttyl tear gas
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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