i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
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