lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
