"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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