They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
