At least make sure they are 18
Why
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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