I wannas sexs uuuuu
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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