just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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