My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
