well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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