You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She's the barista slut.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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