apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
