Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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