Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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