This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
