Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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