Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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