hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
