Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Randomize
