He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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